Bah Humbug

I spent this afternoon in the doctor's surgery, waiting for a drop-in spot to open up.
            I picked up a nice case of pink-eye at school this week.  I woke up this morning convinced I was suffering from the breakaway allergy attack of the season, but by noon, I had to face up to it: full blown Conjunctivitis. Stepping out of a shower to "wash away the mystery pollen" I saw myself in the mirror and stopped in faint shock: my eyes glowed in the mirror like welcome signs for an extremely undiscriminating red light district.
            It's ironic. I'm very careful about not touching my face. I wash my hands like I'm a fiend for dish soap and I keep my hair pinned up in a tight school marm-ish bun, for fear of the hopping, chirruping heads of hair the little darlings bring to school.  I spent yesterday afternoon sitting next to a girl with a gurgling cough that sounded green - and  spent yesterday evening worried about the flu!              Goes to show - when Murphy has it in for you, there's no point in trying to duck.  (You'd probably trip over a toy truck and break your ankle.)  Yes, I am a mean old cross patch who oughtn't be let near children for fear she'll shriek and lay about her with a walking frame, bellowing that they were less germ-ridden in her day.
            My poor eyes - I look like a lesser demon from one of the more unpleasant minor hells, and I feel like I've spent an afternoon with my eyes pinned open at the bottom of a swimming pool.  One where bricks of chlorine bob about on the surface like cakes of soap in a tub.
            Bah, humbug and prescription eye-drops, indeed.